(Kaieteur News) – The most clinically meaningful question is not, “How many times are you having sex?” but: Are both partners satisfied with the level, quality and meaning of their sexual and affectionate relationship? The concern arises when one or both partners desire intimacy but sexual contact has become associated with danger, pressure, shame, pain, emotional disconnection, or traumatic memories. Satisfying your partner’s sexual desires is equally important as faithfulness.

Sexual trauma results from childhood sexual abuse or exploitation, rape or attempted rape. It results from sexual coercion in a previous or present relationship, unwanted sexual touching or exposure, being pressured into sexual activity while intoxicated, frightened, dependent, or unable to consent. Repeated experiences in which personal boundaries were ignored and sexual violence within marriage.

In my clinical practice, 89% of clients with PTSD experienced sexual trauma. Sexual trauma has long-term effects on mental health, bodily safety, relationships and sexual functioning. Survivors experience PTSD, depression, anxiety, shame, guilt, dissociation, pelvic or genital pain, substance misuse, sleep disturbances and difficulty trusting intimate partners.